midsummer malaise

I am definitely suffering from some midsummer malaise. Wimbledon, the NHL draft and free agency only covered me through the very beginning of July. Now I'm forced to fish for info on enemy blogs and sniff around like an anteater for morsels of hockey related innuendo. Thank God Warner Bros pushed Harry Potter 6 back from November to July. I love that kid, both the character and the actor Daniel Radcliffe. While I'm enthralled with Harry's destiny, Dan is just way cooler than Harry. You'd assume that he be the personification of middle of the road, but even at 15 he had surprisingly great taste in music and basically everything else. This is the moment I fell for him, years before he decided to display his bits 8 times a week on Broadway (thanks Dan). I'm just crazy about his dorky enthusiasm. He actually reminds me a great deal of Roger Federer - both cool dudes, comfortable with themselves but also total spazzes. Y'all know how much I love Rog, and I'm so happy for him and Mirka, proud new parents of twin baby girls. He's gonna be the best papa (and the most stylish too!)

On to hockey, there hasn't been much news, especially for my blueshirts, just enough to keep my mind busy from one Sunday to the next when I cannot wait to read Larry Brooks' Slap Shots column. He always delivers at least one spot-on jab every week. This week he called Jeremy Roenick "Jere-me". Classic. Unfortunately his column hasn't had the degree of speculation of past summers, but there has been a little floating around. First is that Shanahan is only considering the Devils and the Rangers, especially now that Renney has moved on to Edmonton. I'm still not sure how Shanny will fit in with this team, but I do know we're short on LWs and I would love this guy back in blue. I tried to ignore his recent months in red and black, and I'll just forget them all together if he's back in my locker room. Besides with Freddie gone we have to pump up our scar quotient. Nobody does face scars better than Shanny, unless you count Oliver Reed. The other former Red Wing looking to sport the Blue, white and red is that bag of bones Chris Chelios. I have a couple of problems with this potential signing. First Chelios is ancient. It was one thing to cheer him when he was captain of the US team at the 2002 Olympics, but that was 7 years ago. We just don't have the budget or the room on the bench for a guy who can only contribute to a quarter of the season. Pre-lockout surely, but not now. Plus Sean Avery let drop a while back that Chelly's not fond of the stick raise tribute the Rangers originated in the NHL a few season's back. Chelios is just jealous that he can't raise his stick above half-mast without the aid of CIALIS. The only benefit might be his BFF John McEnroe would give the Rangers even more shoutouts during tennis broadcasts, but even less people watch tennis than hockey. I know they'll all be partying at Warren 77 if this all plays out.

Sean Avery's been doing his part to stay in the news, dating footballer's castoffs and showing off his disco abs in the Hamptons. If he wants to moonlight at my personal trainer, I'd be happy to follow his every instruction. C'mon Sean, I need something to keep me occupied until September. Can you work out to Belle and Sebastian?