Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Presidents' Trophy here we come!

So yeah, I hope y'all had a great summer. There wasn't much to like or to report about my decimated Rangers, so I said, "Fuck it!" and haven't written in nearly 3 months. Even the start of training camp was too dull to cover. The interviews were unbelievably bland (I'm looking at you Henrik with a sparkle and a wink, which YOU clearly left in Sweden!). The MSG season preview skipped anyone with personality. Sather keeps dangling Shanahan over our heads with the possible promise of someone handsome, charming and angry representing the team. The Rangers couldn't even win a preseason game without J and myself in the audience. Thank god for Europe (the region, not the band). Winning will heal most grievances and we swept our four game trip overseas, so thank you Rangers for pulling it together. Maybe we won't need personality if every postgame is a celebration. It definitely feels good to be at the top of the league even if it's only for a few more days.

The good times started for the Rangers with two exhibition games in Switzerland. I propose that the fabulous showing there was kharmically predestined by Swiss super athlete Roger Federer winning the US Open. Now the two things don't have much to do with each other, but in my sports world July was ruined with Sather's dismissal of my favorite players and Federer's loss at Wimbledon, so obviously I view Roger's dominence at the Open (thanks to me in Arthur Ashe I'm sure) as heralding a positive shift in sports mysticism. I think because I was able to witness Roger kissing the beautiful Open trophy this fall (and perhaps 08-09) will be blessed with all good things. Is this too new agey?

So yeah, Switzerland. After scoring 2 goals in all 6 North American pre-season games and going 1-5, the Rangers rout the Swiss team 8-1. Everyone on the teams scores, it's beautiful. Then the Rangers crush the hopes of Russian champions Metallurg Magnitogorsk by rebounding from 3 zip down to win 4-3 with the beauty Callahan game winner clicking in at 19:39 in the 3rd. The Russians are crying and I'm not sure if it's because they lost out on $100,000 bonuses or because the
KHL (read KGB) plan to hurt their families because they lost!

In a move than can be seen as both classy and dickish, Drury and Gomez decided to let Russian Rangers Zherdev and Kalinen accept this trophy. It's pretty ugly, but it makes a great logo, especially when it used as a Charlie's Angels style wipe during the broadcast. I was just happy to see Zherdev's face because the Rangers hide him away like his lack of English is a major deformity. He's obviously well formed and MSG and the Rangers should know by now that foreigners speaking English poorly is a comic delight and a thrill for fans all over this great nation. Why deny us? I think Zherdev may be my favorite new player aside from Henrik. I'll know for sure when I hear his accent, so get on it John Giannone!

On to Prague. Drury's named captain, and despite his blandness I think he'll make a good one. I'm hoping for great, but we'll see what happens. In my mind I've made him the Atticus Finch of the NHL. I think he's gonna be the a quiet but supportive dad to this team. He's gonna personally teach Zherdev to read, write and speak English, he's gonna convince Dubinsky to abandon his rough trade look (which is somehow worse this season), He's gonna learn Colton Orr scoring touch, and he's gonna keep Redden off the pipe. What a guy- go to it Drury!

We went on to win our first two games that count against Tampa "We'll buy any player available" Bay. The Ace of Base mojo works for fellow Swede Naslund because he scored just moments after "The Sign" shuffled onto my Pod. Thank you Naslund, thank you Pod gods. Henrik played great keeping his GAA nice and low. Thank you Henrik.

Dubinsky, Redden and Gomez chipped in with the other goals. Notice his teammates avert their eyes from Gomer's face. He can perform, but jeesh he's no looker!

The team's looking solid despite a surplus of forwards (note to Sather: Please don't dump Freddie! We love him). Onto the home opener against Chicago. J and I will be in the house. I'm hoping to stay at the top of league for as long as we can manage - shooting for April, hoping for June. Let's go Rangers!

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